What Is It That We Are So Afraid Of?
In a short one-day break from my series on the rich, wonderful world of the transformative power of shame, I wanted to just throw a question out the blogosphere; in particular, the portion of the blogosphere readers that concern themselves with matters spiritual, metaphysical, or just plain curious.
I was meeting with a client tonight who is undergoing a lot of turmoil over a decision needing to be made. This person has a strong inner knowing what the decision is for them, yet is agonizing over what to do, often telling themselves, "I don't know what to do," or "I don't know what I want." In the case of this person, it was obvious to me that this individual knows what "The Truth" is, but the ego is so at odds with this person's heart's truth, that it feels compelled to keep this person in a perpetual state of distress and emotional vapor lock. So, what's the question already?
It's simply this (and it's a two-parter)…"How often do you really ignore and/or overlook what your own intuition is telling you about any given situation?" And, "When you do, what are you getting instead?"
I want to invite my readers to look at that for themselves. Look honestly and candidly. How much do you override your own instinct and your own nature? If you do, why? When you DO override your instincts, what is really winning?
What do you end up choosing instead of your own nature and your own inner guidance?
I invite people to comment on this post by answering these three questions and then sharing what you've gotten to learn from getting caught up in that patterns.
Maybe it's going to be freeing to look your purpose squarely in the eye and get the opportunity to share it once and for all.
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Ok, here goes… answering the three questions.
1. How much do I override my own instinct and my own nature?
Even though I consider myself to be someone who is “out of the box”, it still seems I control what I do or say a lot.
2. I still care what “other” people think about me, and hold myself back when it feels like someone wouldn’t know how to “communicate” or work through something.
Also I am still making friends with the unknown, and learning to allow that unknown to be benevolent instead of a misperceived “threat”.
3. When I override my instincts, what is really winning?
Fricken good question! I imagine it to be a whiny little energy pretending to be in control, pretending to have my best interest at heart. Like an abusive mother pretending to keep its child safe from the big bad world.
I don’t know what this is… jsut that I feel at the effect of it, and feel identified with “it”.
I know that when I do not follow my heart it is because I allow my ego to wrap it’s nasty grasp around it, Which never benefits me. I stay locked in fear allowing myself to believe I am incapable of doing what is necessary to grow past this fear. What I have learned (and it is an ongoing battle for me)is to tell my ego to shove it. I always think of other people and how they are able to do these things that I live in fear about. I say to myself if they can do it so can I, It’s seems to make a bridge for me. I also have these moments of beating myself up due to knowing the truth and not acting on it. I try to give myself a break and say “when you get there drea, you’ll get there”.
Chelle and Drea,
Thanks for your comments. One thing I’d say, right off the bat, is to Drea’s comment on telling your ego to shove it. That is precisely the wrong thing to do. It’s more about learning more about your ego in a way that you can love it into submission. You telling it to shove it is what helps that part of your ego stay so tenacious and stubborn. You need to learn what that part of your ego is needing, and explore healthy, balanced ways in which to try to meet the needs that seem right and reasonable to your Spirit.